CHOICES (18+)

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I often wondered what I would do if I saw her again.

She hadn’t contacted me for over a year, and I didn’t reach out to her either then that evening happened.

I stepped out of the shower to a beeping notification on my phone. I picked up the phone from the dresser where I had placed it, and it was her, Maryam.

My heart skipped a bit.

She was asking to meet at Eden Garden.

I had just had a long day at work, and I really just wanted to lay down and rest, watch something, but it was Maryam…

I placed my phone back on the dresser, put on some briefs, and got into bed, resuming the last episode of Ballers but I couldn’t concentrate. So I went, and I met with her.

It felt good seeing her and talking with her again. She said that she was sorry for how things had gone between us and asked to be friends. I didn’t mind being friends. Besides, I was seeing someone serious.

 

A FEW MONTHS LATER

Maryam and I spent much time talking on the phone. We met up a few times, too, and the more time we shared, the more it brought back feelings I thought I had buried. I found myself smiling at my phone, and it was all because of her.

She was still as interesting as ever, naughty, and unpredictable. You didn’t know what she would say next or do, and I found that to be very intriguing.

I grew fond of her, way too fond of her. Too fond. So I was going to tell her, I was going to end it all; it had to stop – the friendship!

 

I waited for her at Millennium Park at the close of work. Bad idea, I already knew. Too secluded. But it was her favorite garden, and she insisted we meet there.

I found an open space under some trees and waited for her.

She came carrying snacks, drinks, and a mat. Legs so long in those blue shorts she had on, her black blouse clinging too closely to her tiny waist.

I hadn’t even opened my mouth yet it felt like my mission was already being jeopardized. I certainly did not need all that sexiness she came carrying with her.

“Maryam, we are not having a picnic,” I declared.

“Well, hello to you too!” She smiled forgivingly, rolled out the mat, and began setting down items from her tote bag.

As she bent over, her bum formed a protruded round shape… C’mon now!

I looked away.

“Kanu.”

“Mmm?” I turned around to find her sitting on the mat. 

“Sit down,” She invited, patting the space next to her. “Have some chocolates,” She smiled.

That smile!

“Okay, Maryam, time out! Listen, I don’t want to have chocolates and I don’t want to sit down!”

She darted her eyes sideways, a small frown creasing her forehead.

“We need to talk,” I announced, breathlessly.

“Okay, so talk. Why are you being so uptight today anyway?” 

I began to pace the ground.

“Kanu!”

“I can’t stop thinking about you,” I blurted, stopping in my tracks and her face relaxed into a broad smile.

“That’s sweet,” she remarked.

“No, it’s not sweet, it’s a problem!”

She stood to her feet and strolled up to me. “Well, if it makes you feel any better, I think about you all the time too.”

“Maryam you don’t understand,” I insisted, losing my defenses.

“Then make me,” she persuaded.

“I’m at work, and I’m thinking about you. I’m hanging with the guys, I’m thinking about you. I’m fucking her yet I’m still thinking about you.”

Debilitated, I lowered down to a rock close by.

She strolled unto me, placed one folded knee on my lap then wrapped her arms around my neck.

Maryam, she didn’t have the prettiest face, but something about her had always drawn me in and held me down…

She still moved me. I knew the feeling was wrong, but a part of me still couldn’t let her go.

“I don’t know what to do,” I confessed in the quietest of whispers, staring up into her eyes.

“Maybe you could just fuck me,” she suggested, as quiet as my words, “get it out of your system.”

And there it was! The salient approval I tried to deny myself…

She lowered her head to my face, and I met her halfway, hungrily! I drew in her legs so that they were wrapping around my waist. She must have had some of those chocolates because I could taste them on her tongue.

I ran my hands up her sides, slipping them underneath her blouse. I slid them up to the small of her breasts and cupped both globes at once. 

She paused, chuckling, “Someone could see us.”

“I don’t care,” I groaned longingly, pinning my forehead to hers. “We’ve done freakier things in the past.”

She laughed.

I got up anyway, snatched the mat off the ground, took hold of her wrist, and we ran off, giggling like teenagers.

We found an opening under some rocks, sheltered by large trees. I hurriedly laid out the mat and pulled her into my embrace. I slipped my tongue in between her lips again, letting myself enjoy the warmness of her mouth.

We lowered ourselves to the mat, and I turned her around. She bent over, arching a perfect angle for me.

I was so turned on!

I had been turned on from the moment she walked into the park.

I pulled her shorts down to her knees and let my trousers fall to mine. I stroked my hardened length out of sheer excitement, kneading her bum with my free hand. It felt so soft, softer than I remembered. She looked at me from underneath her arm and wiggled her waist impatiently.

I spanked her ass, thrice! Glancing sideways to confirm that no one was coming, I thrust into her…

Goodness gracious! she felt warm and moist. It was like stepping into a bath with the perfect temperature.

I plowed deeper until I was completely buried inside her then I held still, savoring the sweetness of my pulsating tip against the moistness of her hole. Her warmness spread through my cock, and I pulled out until I was barely in before slamming back in again.

I drove in and out of her. Slowly at first, then faster…and harder.

She stretched her arm backward to me, something we always did. I took it, then she stretched out the other, and I crossed both hands at her back. Holding them in place, I rammed in and out of her, satisfying every inch of hunger I’ve starved for her!

She moaned my name, continuously, and I watched satisfyingly as her cheeks bounced softly against me. 

Oh, fuck!

I felt myself enlarging inside of her, I continued to drive in and out, hanging on to the deliciousness of her pussy until I enlarged so much that I sprung out and let my cum sprout all over her ass!

I put my hands on my waist and admired my art. She broke away laughing, and I laughed, too.

 

 

“Babe, tell me you have some tissue with you.”

“I do, check the bag,” she replied heartily.

I pulled my trousers to my waist and hurried to where we had been before. I collected tissue from her bag, got back to her, and wiped her clean.

She got dressed while I rolled the mat off the ground, and then together, we walked back to our earlier spot.

I laid out the mat, and we got on it. I placed my hands behind my head and she wrapped her leg around mine with her lips pressed to my neck.

“That was so nice,” she whispered, and I smiled against her braids then said, “You felt amazing babe.”

We laid in that park quietly, listening to the birds chirp and tweet.

The trees swayed, their leaves rustling under the dry breeze. We could hear the faint voices of people, walking past in the distance. It was all so serene. I finally understood why she liked the park so much.

“What’s going to happen now, to us?” she asked, almost in a whisper.

I knew this was coming.

“I’ll tell her.”

“You’ll tell her we had sex?” her voice laced with astonishment.

“No, of course I won’t tell her we had sex. I just need some time to sort out my feelings.”

Truthfully at that moment, my heart felt confused on which way to go, – home to her or there with Maryam.

 

 

Daisy, my girlfriend, came over the following evening.

She made dinner – spaghetti with pawns and carrots and greens, and as we sat down to eat, I couldn’t stop looking at her.

I thought about how devoted she had been to me, how strongly she had loved me.

It all came rushing back to me, the sacrifices she had made—all that time she spent waiting patiently for me to reciprocate her love.

I had found it difficult to trust women after Maryam. Our breakup made me an angry man. I didn’t care about commitment anymore, I just wanted to smack and move, yet, Daisy stuck around, forgiving me, showering me with love and concern.

She was peace, she was calm, she was certainty, and that was what I decided I needed in my life.

Maryam had let me down in the past for no good reason, and even though I still had strong feelings for her, even though she rocked my very soul, I didn’t know if she was going to let me down again. And that was a chance I was no longer willing to take.

“You’ve been staring…” Daisy grinned into my thoughts. “What are you thinking of?”

“How lucky I am to have you?”

Her smile broadened. “We are both lucky. Eat your food.”

 

 

 

I decided to stay away from Maryam, but it wasn’t easy.

Maryam was not the kind of girl you forgot in a hurry.

I missed her.

Four days passed, and I managed to avoid her calls.

The last time I tried to end things with her, I ended up fucking her. I didn’t trust myself around her, so I just kept it moving.

I was on my difficult fifth day of not speaking to her when the intercom on my desk rang.

I picked up the receiver to my ear.

“Sir, one Maryam is here to see you,” my secretary’s voice informed at the other end.

My heart dropped. Did she come to my place of work?

I was still holding the receiver to my ear when Maryam barged in, with my secretary at her heels, arguing at her, trying to stop her.

“It’s okay Christy.” 

“I’m very sorry sir,” the overpowered girl apologized.

“It’s fine.”

Christy turned back around and walked out of the office, closing the door after her.

Maryam made herself comfortable in the black swivel chair at my desk. She crossed her long legs meticulously, swinging herself from side to side. I was staring at her, waiting for what she would say.

“So,” she finally spoke, in a calm that haunted me, “you’re ignoring me now?” 

“Maryam…”

“You’re just gonna fuck me and that’s it?” she shrugged dismissively, “I thought we were unto something, you know? headed somewhere.”

Why was she so calm? what then was the point of barging in?

“Can you just stop swinging like that?”

“Why? does it bother you?” She taunted me.

I heaved heavily, stood up, and walked around to her side of the desk.

I leaned down against the brown wood. 

She was still swinging, so I bent forward and clasped the arm of the chair, stopping it.

She frowned, but that was better. I would take that over her unusual calm.

I let the chair go and held my hands together on my thighs.

“You have been ignoring my calls,” she accused.

I nodded regretfully, “…Sometimes you don’t talk to someone because its just so hard.”

“But I am hurting because you are not talking to me.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” I said honestly.

“What is it really?”

“I love her Maryam,” I didn’t mince my words.

And she sat up in the chair. “But I want to be with you. I loved you first. I know I messed up but that is not going to happen again.”

“Maryam, you walked out on our three-year relationship to be with the same guy you had assured me you could never date. How am I supposed to trust you again?”

“I made a mistake, but I can right it. I just need a chance to show you.” she reached out her hands and held my leg. “please let me show you. It will be different this time, I swear it.”

Her plea and round brown eyes tugged at my heart, but I didn’t say anything.

“How about the moments we’ve shared?” She continued, “Was that all an act? Did it even mean anything?”

“Of course it did, you know it did. But because I feel these things doesn’t mean I should keep acting on them. I’m just trying to do the right thing here. Maryam, she picked me up when you left me, I was in a really bad place and she helped me out. I really don’t want to let her down.”

She swallowed, staring blankly at me, her hands still wrapped around my leg, and I watched as a deep sadness spread across her face.

“I’m so sorry,” I said honestly. “I didn’t mean to lead you on, or whatever, I was very confused myself.”

“So that’s it? Can’t you at least give me a month or something? Some time?—”

“I’m sorry, Maryam, it has to end now.”

She stared at me, tears gathering in the corners of her eyes.

Then, as if suddenly coming to terms with my words, she let my leg go and reached for her purse.

She sniffed as she stood to her feet and turned her back to me. Then, she began to make her way towards the door.

“I’m sorry,” I called after her. It was all that I could say.

She stopped and glanced back at me. “Yeah,” she said dryly, “Me too.”

And then she was gone, out the door and away from my life.

 

 

She never called after that day, and I didn’t blame her.

I fought every urge to call her, telling myself that it was better this way.

A lot of time has passed since that time, but I still think about her and I wonder how she is doing.

 

 

 

THE END.

One thought on “CHOICES (18+)”

  1. The sex words need to be described in a fashion,to arose the reader ….

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